Winner, Winner, Turkey Dinner!

It does not happen very often, but when it does, you just might wonder a little for the sanity of turkeys everywhere.

I dare say that people do not understand that turkeys are were, and are very vicious creatures. So dreadful was the plight of the pilgrims that they took to a concept of thanksgiving to describe the vast slaughter of antagonistic turkeys. Imagine the destruction of the pilgrims at the hand of the turkeys, and that only with the help of the local Indian tribes did the immigrants survive a winter of mass murder and mayhem.

Why else would Benjamin Franklin offer up the turkey as the national bird and symbol of our nation? Obviously it showed more tenacity as a fighter and ruffian than the eagle. However, at the time, Britain probably did not have the standard encounter with the turkey that many Americans had. Thus the eagle edged out the turkey with one vote, the tie broken by a closet loyalist who had escaped persecution.

To see a turkey come up over the top of a hill, bathed in a sunrise, filtering colors of demonic rage must have been a terrifying sight to behold. Without the flintlock musket, our forefathers would have been on the platters of turkeys everywhere. Tactics, taught by the Indians,  then allowed the pilgrims to further cement their beachhead against the avian onslaught.

So when you are standing in line on Black Friday to get you next gadget or super savings from sales, remember all those who died to subjugate turkeys to our rule.



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